I seem to spend a lot of my day “on hold” to various people and the “hold” music always interests me. It can be the type of music that makes me instantly want to put the phone down, this is probably the intention of the person who put it on there in the first place. Jazz has that effect on me, it really grates on my ears and is probably due to too much Cleo Laine on the TV when I was kid trying to go to sleep on the sofa in the living room when I lived with my Auntie. Her shrill “do wap de wap” chorus was certainly never dulcet tones to my ears or conducive to a rocking to sleep as a youngster.

If its Dr Hook on the hold music for example I could shake maracas or pretend I am 15 again with the nearest thing that doubles up as a pretend microphone, my old boss used to say I was like Beyonce with a headset on, bopping around in my seat to the best hold music. In fact we used to stop what we were doing and watch YouTube’s of Imagination and Shalamar and the like strutting their stuff in their metallic gold lamรฉ outfits and collapse in fits of giggles. If he is reading this he will know who he is and I miss working with him as he was such fun. Its those moments that make it all worthwhile and we all need a laugh in a day.

The hold music today was sadly not Dr Hook, however but mainly some kind of loop of something you hear streamed from a supermarket tannoy, neither pleasant nor something you can actually sing along to. Maybe we should listen to our own hold music and see if it is something we would be happy to sit listening to. The other comical thing about today was my inability to type. I seem to have written no end of “nitified” rather than notified or “resdients”, rather than residents, which showed me I should have not been trying to multi task whilst hanging on the telephone…